In a hard world, I find somethings that give me hope...
August 27, 2014
Going into today, I have so much to do to get Big Spirit Studio ready for you all this fall. I have been really enjoying watching the studio grow and change already. Just from this first summer session I can see where storage is needed and systems will have to change a bit. It is exciting. And it is cool to notice in myself the part of me that has learned to see the journey and enjoy it. Because it’s all the journey, right? I am grateful to be less hung up on the destination, because probably that doesn't exist anyway!
As I work on this on the computer and build that in the studio to get stuff moving for my business, I can’t help my mind returning to all the crazy things happening in our world. There is soooo much to discuss and take action on and I feel that pull to be part of a positive and active solution all the time. As a privileged member of the world I feel it is my responsibility to be. And I question if art is even enough of a contribution?
But it is one of the gifts I was given and so I will pass it on. Art has made a huge difference in my self esteem and my understanding of my inner world and spirituality. A place from which I speak and act. Surely that will help others, especially kids, develop a strong self to be more able to be active, effective members of a positive society? Goddess, I really pray so.
And so this morning, feeling heavy and weighted by “it all’, I have turned my attention to my body. What is the reaction to different stimulus today in my body. Here I find something worth sharing with you.
Around my yard and Big Spirit Studio I see beauty in a lot of different forms. The vegetables we grow for food and to teach our kids about sustainable lifestyles and where food comes from. We have a small forest of chard and kale growing here. It is so hardy healthy. And my body says to me “nourishment”. And the deep greens sooth my eyes and mind. The bright red tomatoes remind me that all this healthy nourishment is also meant to be fun and be enjoyed. Right of the vine! How can a tomato remind me to smile when so much craziness is happening all around?!
All around the yard are toys and dress ups strewn about. A kid’s play tent is full of the aftermath of some kind of potion tea party. Play. My messy yard is the result of joyous imagination play that happens here everyday. Faeries fly through here and a kind of 2 year old’s baseball is played. Inner worlds are developing and being nurtured by the time and space provided in our little yard. Gratitude. Always gratitude that we can provide this to our kids and their friends. And here again my mind turns to those who don’t get this and the extreme inequity is not lost on me. As a “do-er” I make the mental note that I must do more to help kids get access to play, this vital part of growing up…
Inside the studio is a bit of a mess. Clay splatters on the ground around the wheel and paint on the wall. Stains of this and that on the tables and floors that I find beautiful. Creativity! And here I feel excited and fulfilled and energized! Here is a yes! I take the time to enjoy the little things in here before I get the studio all prettied up for the birthday party this weekend. A smile of possibility comes to my face as I look at the piles of colorful papers, the drying screen prints hanging above me, the tubs of pens and paintbrushes. The bins of things I collect for young creative minds to turn into their next amazing artwork. The finished and unfinished art works made be the genius minds and hands of the students here. Things I wouldn't make, just as others wouldn't make what I do, but that I learn and grow from and encourage. Here those little artist get to freely explore their inner worlds and express their experiences of the greater world. They, I, We, are engaging in expression that humans have long been called to create. My chest fills with Hope. Yes hope. That isn't just a slogan for a politician that, again, is letting us down. It is a necessary component for the drive to face all the challenges that seem so insurmountable even from where I stand so privileged.
We, I, need beauty and hope and play and imagination and gratitude. Otherwise what would we strive for? What would grow to?
Tears stream down my face. I get it. This moment gave me a small brilliant reminder of the human part of myself and us all that no matter our situation we all crave beauty. We all need to play sometimes and express our true selves. And yes I get to say all this from a very privileged place (I keep saying it because it is true and must be addressed), there are a greater number of people struggling to just have life. Still this moment showed me that all us humans struggle and strive because we hope to experience and express beauty.
There is absolutely more I and we can do everyday to improve our world. We are creating this reality every moment. And it is not easy to effect change in ourselves or societies and structures. Yet in this moment I feel hope in my body. Perhaps offering a little bit of time and space to play and express ourselves I am adding a positive drop to the bucket. That feels a bit lighter and gives me fuel to keep going. Because there is a lot to do...